This is documentation of our journey to parenthood. We are in the process of conceiving baby Barrett. This will be a complex journey filled with emotion, endless questions, lots of hope, and hopefully a bundle of joy. We are inviting you to join in on our quest of making our family.
My name is Beka and my partner’s name is Barrett (she prefers her last name). Since we live in Oklahoma and same sex marriage is not legal here, we will soon be changing my last name to Barrett. Barrett, Barrett, Barrett! Name changes, sperm ordering, insemination, insemination, insemination, morning sickness, birthing, custody, parenting …………its going to be a journey. Please join the fun!
The judge was great. She didn’t play 20 questions or grill me like I had worried she would. It was truly painless. I had worked myself up thinking, “whatever judge we got was going to be a homophobe.” I was afraid they would tell us no, just because we are a same sex couple.
Maybe the world is not as judgemental as most assume. Or maybe we were blessed with an open minded judge. Either way I am overjoyed by the outcome. I am proud to have this last name. When judge Schumacher granted my request for the name change I teared up. I am pretty sure she doesn’t realize what it means to us. It means the world.
This may be the closest we will ever come to being married. The country has come a long way. Catch up Oklahoma!
Tomorrow 050912, is the day we find out if we can work our way around these crazy Oklahoma laws in order to share the same last name.
Wish us luck!
“Patience!…. It is very important that this child and I have the correct last name!”
Patience is harder and harder to come by!
Oklahoma Name Change Kit from
www.uslegalforms.com $49.95 - instant download
Kit contains: Petition for Change of Name - Notice of Filing Petition for Name Change - Publisher’s Affidavit - Order of Name Change - Civil Cover Sheet
The petition and the notice of filing are the first two documents that I had to use. I knew all of this because the kit also came with instructions. Apparently I failed to read the instructions fully……the Petition for Change of Name must be filled out completely and notarized before attempting to file it at the county courthouse. Not only did I get all the way to the court house, go through the metal detector, a search of my belongings, I managed to make it to the court clerk just to be told that my petition must be notarized but cannot be notarized at the courthouse.
So, I left to find the nearest State Farm Insurance agency in hopes that they had a notary. Got my petition notarized and returned to the courthouse. I stopped by a restroom to put my belt back, which I had to remove to clear the metal detector. I made it back to the court clerk’s desk to file my petition for $125.70 and was told I had a choice of dates for which I would like to schedule the judge to hear my case.
Then I realized I did not have my phone…….I left it on top of the toilet paper dispenser. “Patience” I remind myself. I go get my phone and pick a date ……May 9th 2012 at 1:30pm.
The next step for me was to fill out the Notice of Filing Petition for Name Change and take it to the local newspaper, The Norman Transcript, for them to run it in the newspaper at least 10 days prior to the date set for the hearing, $21.60.
Meanwhile I must completely fill out the Publisher’s Affidavit, Order of Name Change, and Civil Cover Sheet before appearing before the judge at the hearing.
Cross my fingers the judge says…….“Approved! …… . . … . ….. Your last name is now Barrett”
Below is a break down of how much one might expect to spend in Oklahoma to change their name and I hope that someone will find this useful. Feel free to contact me, I would be more than happy to share my documents with anyone in order to save you money and time.
Name change total cost:
Birth Certificates $ 22.00
Name Change Kit $ 49.95
File Name Change Petition $125.70
Publish Notice in Newspaper $ 21.60
This money is no object to me when It comes to having the correct last name. The name that feels right. The name that will make our family feel more whole. The name that Oklahoma would like to refuse me to have. I hope that one day every state in our nation will allow us to be the families that we all want to be, without jumping through all kinds of hoops.
I can’t wait to be a Barrett…………
Finally got my new birth certificates. My original one that I’ve had all these years was only a certified photo copy. These look really official. Now, I can continue on in the process of changing my name. Yeah!
Changing my name involves a lot more work than I expected. I have to “pull out of thin air” a name change packet. It contains a petition for name change and various other documents to guide me through the process. I call the court house in the county I reside and they do not have these documents. The court clerk tells me that I can find a name change packet at Office Depot or Office Max. The Office “whatever” say they don’t carry them, to check at the Social Security Office.
So I have searched online and found a site to purchase one, but I’m not sure it is legit. We shall see. I plan to do some more checking…….
During the process of “pulling a name change packet out of thin air” I have found out that I will need certified copy of my birth certificate…..which I don’t have. I have mailed off for a couple of copies from the county I was born in Arkansas, $22. It could take 4-6 weeks to get back to me. Hooray! I now have plenty of time to locate a name change packet.
Patience!…….it is very important that this child and I have the correct last name!